The Search For Something Magical

I am online researching curses.  Actually, I'm researching how to break curses. I think this action could be categorized as desperation.  My mom is rapidly deteriorating and I can't see the harm in buying her some sort of talisman to help protect her from any curse that someone might have placed on her.I know, I know, she has a disease.  But we are doing everything to tr

eat the disease, and what if she DOESN'T have a disease...? What if it's a curse?  We are not doing anything to treat that, so maybe its time I stepped up to realize I might sound crazy but I'll forgo my sanity if there is even a .01% chance that it helps. 

I can already hear some friends whispering now, how i've lost it and to face reality, she is ill.  A fact I am more than aware of, in fact, I think i'm beginning to focus in hyper-reality now-- things, possiblities, no-- options-- are presenting themselves more openly now and I am willing to risk the appearance of sanity for them.

So tomorrow I am on a search for the proper amulet for my mom, then I will figure out a way to have it blessed.  I can't wait for the conversation at work on tuesday...

"So, did you do anything special last weekend?"

"No, layed out by the pool, went to a bbq, found a curse-breaking amulet for my mom and had it blessed."

This is LA, right, so I think it would flow very nicely in a conversation.

An idea like this didn't just pop into my head one day, I have been thinking about it for 2 years or so, and perhaps my entire life.  Our family is from Pakistan, the entire heritage is rooted there... so if you go far back enough (and some not far back at all), you can see that there were/are witches in our family, people who practice black magic and what not.  Take this as you will, but this thought stuck in my head ever since I  heard it when I was a child.  

Voodoo, black magic, Wicca, white magic-- all have existed for centuries-- many of these types of practices require physical results, you put a curse on somebody, you see that person affected. There's got to be some truth to it, for them to be sustained to this day.  I believe in God, I believe in many things, many powers of positivity and love and optimism, I guess I just never wanted to acknowledge the flip side of those beliefs, but to every yin there is a yang.

The good thing is, most people who are going crazy don't think they are crazy at all--- so the fact that I can see how this all seems odd means I still have my sanity.  For now anyway.